life, music and boredom

I don't want to be a frustrated person. For example, I haven't been making progress with my frustrated musical life. When I say that I have a musical life doesn't mean that I'm confident with any musical skills. I don't even think of myself as a musician or someone who's musically inclined. I would like to be and I try to be sometimes, but most of the time, I end up being frustrated. It's a lifestyle that I can't hold on to in the long run. The artist's lifestyle.. I dream of it sometimes. Everyday I would write on tissue napkins a song that would move a lot of people or simply look cool. Wait.. pshh haha. Vanity ruins. How can I not be frustrated when I'm in a management course? Where do I get to express myself? Maybe I graph mathematical equations in abstract ways-- a possible reason why I get low marks in math.

Any chances of the artist in me to bloom was killed when I chose not to go to ust. The course I had in ust was more promising to me in terms of enjoyment but logic came first. The other school seemed to have more job opportunities.

But I'm happy now. Forget about everything I said about being frustrated in life. I'm happy now and that's what's important. If I don't grow up to be the person I want to become then I'm the one who's at fault. If i really wanted to become that person, I should be starting right now. Those people who say they've made the wrong decisions in life lie. Maybe they did but there a lot of chances to correct them. I know that artist that I was dreaming about hasn't been killed yet. yey. labo.

There are reasons why I'm staying at this school, in my course and doing the things I'm doing. I can't name them all but there's one word which can temporarily describe the feeling I have--Bahala na. It may sound stupid and wreckless at first, but i think every person who uses that word really have their own meaning for it.

The truth is I'm bored that's why I made it longer that it was supposed to be.
The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy fat dog.

alone at 5:46 PM (7) comments

black magic

The three days were nothing but fantastic. If I was to pick a scene during that trip that could sum it all up, it would be the scene where some of us were hunting shooting stars while coldplay's clocks was playing.. a bit cheesy but completely stellar nonetheless.. tenenenenenen..nenenen..

alone at 9:38 PM (0) comments

stamp

Break!
I don't believe in jinxes but there are times when I do.
Right now I don't but later I probably would.
To be safe, let's not jinx anything today.
It's just funny how people believe in such things--knocking on wood or
looking like they just got hurt. Anyway, I think I'm going to have a go at it.

I won't die within three days. (don't knock on anything please)

alone at 9:17 AM (0) comments

wreckage

I've been dragging myself on almost everything for the past few days. They all say that the last stretch is where you have to give your all.
It's true, but sometimes I finish in a catastrophe. There's this dark cloud of grey smoke and the smell of burning rubber. Maintaining high revs towards the end just increases engine temperature. The chequered flag's just around the corner but my tires are already worn out. The transmission is failing with the clutch constantly slipping.

I can't access the higher gears
without slowing down.
As usual, the mind's willing but the flesh is weak.

I'm one lap down and I'm leaving behind a trail of oil.
vroooom!

alone at 11:43 AM (7) comments

crikey

I talked to our dog. Too bad I couldn't remember the sound of her voice. Yes, that's what I dreamt last night. It was so dumb, I didn't even realize the impossibility of it-- starting the whole conversation and all. It all started in Steve Irwin's zoo wherever that is. I know there's one.. Anyway, our dog went swimming with a couple of crocodiles in their make shift swamp when suddenly, these two crocodiles clamp their jaws on our poor dog and chewed on him for several minutes. I just watched the murder from the shore. After chewing on him the crocs let him go and I quickly went to our dog and asked him if she was okay O_o. She told me that they were biting him (obviously) and that it hurt a lot. I remember asking her a few more questions before I woke up.

I been wanting to eat lunch at 7-11. I've been planning it for almost a month now but I always end up eating at the mad clown's fast food or somewhere I don't want to. There's this brand of instant noodles I ate at 7-11 before that's really nice and makes me sweat like mad.

alone at 10:33 PM (2) comments